2022 is officially here.
And it’s about to be un-shore-gettable.
Sorry. We feel gross even just writing that.
But MTV just recently teased the return of Jersey Shore Family Vacation with this made-up adjective, so we felt a need to play along.
On Thursday, the cable network will debut brand new episodes of this beloved series… as it looks to fist pump in the new year.
“As the world continues to change in unexpected ways, the Jersey Shore family is back together and they’re putting it all on the table,” an MTV press release for the new season reads.
“From long overdue meatball days to wild nights in LA with Vinny and Mikes ‘end of probation’ celebration, to DJ Pauly D’s return to the clubs, this group continues to bring the non-stop party wherever they go.”
Sounds like classic Jersey Shore, doesn’t it?
As you likely noticed in that synopsis, nowhere does the name Ronnie Ortiz-Magro appear.
The veteran cast member was arrested last year for domestic violence, seemingly against fiancee Saffire Matos.
Shortly afterward, Ronnie said he was taking a hiatus from shooting in order to focus on his mental health.
“Ronnie is not filming, at least not as of now. The cast started filming a little here and there two weeks ago, but now they are all filming full force, sans Ron,” a source close to the situation told UK tabloid The Sun this summer.
“There is no sign that Ronnie is joining.”
“At least not anytime soon.”
A subsequent report claimed that Ronnie’s co-stars had no interest in sharing a screen with him again.
But good luck telling this to Ronnie.
Back in August, the often-violent personality stated that he was sober and would “hopefully [be back on the show ] at the end of Season 5.”
He can hope all he wants, of course.
This doesn’t mean producers will do what Ronnie says.
As for what Season 5 will feature?
Viewers will meet Mike and Lauren Sorrentino‘s son, Romeo Reign; as well as Cameron, the second son of Deena Cortese and her husband Chris Buckner.
Back when the original version of this program premiered ages ago, did you ever imagine these almost-always-drunk-and-irresponsible cast members would one day become parents?!?
Elsewhere, Angelina Pivarnick and her husband Chris Larangeira will face major problems in their marriage
“We’ve got to work on our relationship,” says Angelina — who actually filed for divorce from Chris in January, yet has not spoken in public about the status of her marriage — in the trailer.
“Therapy is the key.”
Also in the preview, we see the entire gang taking a trip to the Florida Keys.
“Yes, sir, we making up for lost time right here,” DJ Pauly D says in the footage, as the crew hoots and hollers on board a private plane.
The fifth season of Jersey Shore Family Vacation premieres January 6 on MTV.
It will also stream on Paramount Plus.