On 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way Season 3, Episode 8, the couples grappled with cheating, with in-laws, and with their conflicting plans for the future.
Sumit and Jenny finally got his parents to budge … but the price of being “accepted” by his family could be too much for Jenny.
And that might be the whole point, Jenny fears.
Ariela and Avi are in New Jersey for his hernia surgery, but her family reminds her that this could be the best place for her son to grow up.
Corey pleads with Evelin for forgiveness, but she can’t process this while he’s still lurking around.
Ellie and Victor have a lot to do before his house is livable again, and that means spending a lot of money — Ellie’s money.
Plus, there’s that whole cheating thing to work out.
Kenneth and Armando are great dads together, but they’re not quite on the same page when it comes to growing their family.
Steven’s hypocrisy so annoys Alina that she tells her mother about his sexual history.
Jenny Slatten and Sumit Singh
Jenny meets up with Deepali, one of a small number of female friends whom she has made in India. We should keep in mind that she was only with Sumit for so long before the COVID-19 pandemic forced everyone into lockdown, and that between that, being an outsider, and moving while in India, it’s hard to make friends as an adult. But it’s good that she has Deepali, because Jenny wants to talk about what Sumit’s parents have planned.
Deepali is totally Team Jenny & Sumit, but …
As much as she loves her friends as a couple, she knows where Sumit’s parents are coming from because hers would likely say the same if she had an age gap like theirs.
She can, at least, reassure Jenny
When Deepali was married, she tells Jenny, her mother-in-law moved in with them for about half a year. She explains that this is normal in India because families are so interlocked. This doesn’t entirely address Jenny’s concerns, but it does reassure her that this isn’t a hostile move in the exact same way that it would be in the United States. (In the US, a mother-in-law or frankly a mother announcing that she’s going to live with you and tell you exactly how to live your life would be a declaration of war, and the common sense response would be to seriously discuss going no-contact with her)
Sumit is way ahead of her
Back at home, they have ordered a new set of furniture to create a guest room with brand new cabinets and a brand new bed … but Sumit worries that it’s not enough, and says that they should offer his parents their bedroom if that will make them more comfortable. Jenny privately tells the camera that she hopes that Sahna and Anil will decline.
Sumit says that adapting to some cultural norms could help
Unfortunately, one of those norms is waking up extremely early — before dawn, at 5 or 6 in the morning.
Jenny’s reaction is understandable
It’s not that Americans don’t wake up that early. We absolutely do — if it’s part of our chosen routine, or if we have kids, or if we ARE kids going to school, or of course if we’re being paid to get up early for work. But Jenny has been enjoying living her life happily after many years of working hard, and the idea of sacrificing this happiness to appease Sumit’s parents is really not welcome.
Sumit wants to have a routine again
COVID-19 and his whirlwind life with Jenny has changed a lot and he’d like to return to normal. That said … there is an undercurrent to what he is saying that sounds like he wants Jenny to be a full-time homemaker. 90 Day Fiance viewers have seen how sometimes stars will talk about wanting to “embrace their culture” but sometimes they simply mean “specific gender roles that serve my interests.” If that’s what Sumit means, he’s being subtler than most.
Sahna and Anil arrive
They instruct Jenny and Sumit to show them the house, where they immediately poke fun at them for things like rings on their coffee table.
Then they get to the kitchen
Clean dishes are sitting out from where they have been drying (we saw Jenny washing dishes earlier in the episode) instead of on shelves. There is food storage. Frankly, some parts of the kitchen — like the inside of the sink and the corners of the floor — don’t just look messy, but actually dirty.
Then there is this humiliating scene
Sahna orders about Jenny in her own home, directing her not only to clean but how to do it. Meanwhile, everyone else just … stands and watches. Most of us feel uncomfortable just watching someone else clean in our own homes (or, frankly, even in someone else’s), but Sumit makes no move to “learn” how to clean his own kitchen alongside his wife. There are cultural differences at play, and we imagine that this scene must look very different to a lot of people. But … no matter what we think about that kitchen, it’s Jenny’s kitchen, and it’s weird to see someone else order her around.
Ariela Weinberg and Biniyam Shibre
Ariela takes the long series of connecting flights to fly baby Avi back home to Princeton, New Jersey for his hernia surgery. Of course, even though Avi has the right to claim American citizenship, he has never been there, and Ariela hasn’t been there in well over 8 months.
Janice drives to pick up Ariela
With her grandson Roman in the car, Janice and Fred Weinberg make the trip, looking forward to seeing her again and excited to spend time with baby Avi.
This is all very new to Avi, and he likely only remembers his grandparents as voices on a screen (especially Janice’s voice).
Ariela is looking forward to a lot
Her first priority, she stresses to her family, is for Avi to have his surgery and for it to go smoothly. An intestinal hernia might not be the biggest deal in the world, but it’s still surgery on her actual baby.
Ariela calls Biniyam to check in
He shares that he was with his friends just now so that he wouldn’t get bored at home. One, this is a great reminder (like the pandemic was) that a lot of people just don’t have normal, at-home hobbies that can occupy them when they’re not working. Two, this is obviously real-life foreshadowing to problems that the two of them will have as Ariela’s time in the US continues.
Avi meets Ariela’s sister, Kristin
Ariela’s sister sort of shows herself to be a real MVP in this episode, and she clearly adores her 8-month-old nephew.
At dinner, Janice brings up the idea of moving
She hopes that Ariela and Biniyam will move with Avi to live close by, and she hopes to talk them into this. (Please note that part of what we did not see of their storyline, because it seemed to happen between seasons, was Ariela and Biniyam having to take Avi and leave Ethiopia during a period of social unrest … that’s the kind of thing that weighs on a grandparent’s mind)
Ariela isn’t opposed, actually
She reveals that she actually filed for the K-1 visa. It was seven months ago. Unfortunately, other than hearing that her check cleared, Ariela hasn’t heard back, and it could be a while. The COVID-19 pandemic slowed down a lot of things, and of course gave certain government offices an excuse to put a hold on almost all immigration.
Kristin says that it’s time to get serious
Ariela loves traveling the world, but she’s a mom now. Avi is a baby, but he won’t be one forever. It won’t be long before it’s time to look at schools. What kind of educational system does she want him to grow up in? What opportunities does she want Avi to have when he gets older?
But what about Biniyam?
Ariela shares that Biniyam isn’t particularly interested in leaving Ethiopia for the US. On the one hand, that’s totally fair — not everyone wants to live here. But on the other … if Biniyam is breaking down into tears on camera about how much he misses Simon, his first son, it’s puzzling to hear that he’s not interested in taking a chance to live closer to him (a different state, sure, but an entire ocean closer).
The Weinbergs are united on this, though
They tell Ariela that she has done a lot for her husband, giving birth via emergency C-section in an Ethiopian hospital and living there for so long … but while those gestures are sweet, her baby has to come first.
Corey Rathgeber and Evelin Villegas
Corey is staying in the guest room and he continues to write notes to Evelin. She reads one of them on camera. It’s not very inventive, but it’s clearly heartfelt. Literally he’s slipping them under her door.
He’s not helping his case
Evelin told him to GTFO and he keeps lingering. Every time that she sees him, she’s just reminded about how hurt and angry she is over his betrayal — not just the cheating, but the lies about it for the many months that followed.
Corey is sitting there with flowers that cameras of course filmed him picking, and Evelin walks out to that scene. Oh dear.
Enough is enough
Evelin tells him that she’s trying to make this amicable and doesn’t want the drama of involving the landlord or the police, but she told him that he needs to leave and he needs to respect that.
He says that he’ll move out and stay with Raul
Evelin delivers the best line of the episode, telling him that he and Raul can be a new couple. 90 Day Fiance doesn’t have a script but, if it did, that would be this season’s big twist.
Ellie Rose and Victor McClean
Staying in a hotel in San Andres is getting expensive (after all, rates likely rose after Providencia was wiped out), so Ellie and Victor have rented an apartment there. This will also allow them to have room to cook, which should help them to save money.
But this is still a short-term solution
The goal, Victor reminds the cameras, is to use San Andres as a staging area while they fix up Victor’s house and then move back into it. He was lucky, but part of his roof is missing. That’s not livable.
Money isn’t the only uncomfortable subject
It is time, now that the immediate crisis has passed, to discuss Victor’s cheating. He didn’t just bone someone at a party — he was living with another woman, talking about long-term plans with her, and told her that Ellie was just an ex.
Yet apparently it wasn’t “anything serious” for Victor
Victor insists that he understands how hurt Ellie was by it, but acts like it wasn’t that big of a deal. Odd for a man with a domestic violence record after one of his own exes cheated on him. If getting cheated on made him so angry and violent that he did something unforgivable, why would he put someone else through that?
He says that his ex-side-piece lied to Ellie
Ellie was told by this woman that Victor wanted her to buy him a motorcycle, which sounds believable to Victor, but he claims that she didn’t give him money. Oh, boy.
Ellie and Victor go to the store
They need tools and supplies to repair his house in Providencia. Victor includes a machete on the shopping list, and Ellie comments that it’s unlikely that he could find one in an American home improvement store.
Here’s something else that you won’t find in America:
The drill that Victor is looking at is about $150 when converted to USD from the Colombian Peso. Ellie says that she’d expect to pay closer to $50 for something like that in the US, and she’s right — there ARE more expensive drills here, but there are plenty of 60-piece drills from name brand companies for about that price. Not so in Columbia, apparently. This leads to a whole conversation (mostly in Ellie’s mind) about Victor’s seeming lack of appreciation for the value of money and the people who spend so much on him.
Kenneth Niedermeier and Armando Rubio
The two pitch in to give Hannah a fancy little manicure and it’s really sweet. Kenneth admits that he hasn’t done nails in about 15 years — his daughters are, after all, grown adults.
Clearly, he did a great job
Hannah uses toy money from a toy purse to “pay” for her manicure, which is adorable.
Speaking of them being amazing dads …
Armando brings up the idea of having a kid, ideally through a gestational carrier or surrogate. He’s checked out the prospects for adoption in their part of Mexico and, even more so than in the United States, these adoption agencies tend to be religious in nature and unfortunately very hostile to same-sex couples.