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HomeEntertainmentThomas Markle Blasts Meghan and "Ginger Husband" Harry: I Can't Wait to...

Thomas Markle Blasts Meghan and “Ginger Husband” Harry: I Can’t Wait to Face Them In Court!

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As we reported earlier this month, Meghan Markle is being sued by her wicked half-sister Samantha.


Samantha has been riding Meghan’s coattails and trying to get rich off her sister’s fame for a depressingly long time, of course.


But as Twitter bans Samantha for spreading false information and the British tabloid media grows tired of her constant BS, she’s becoming increasingly desperate.


And so, Sam has abandoned her previous grift of trying to earn money from the public based on her flimsy ties to Meghan.


Now, she’s using the law to try and squeeze money from Meghan directly.


Sammy’s latest attempt at extortion has not received a lot of support, and even her former allies in the British tabloid media are turning their backs on this sh-tshow.


But Samantha still enjoys the support of a man who’s been backing her grifts and cons since day one, her number one partner in literal crime, Thomas Markle. 


When he’s not faking heart attacks to get out of social obligations, Thomas is doing his best to interfere with Meghan’s happiness.


Whether he’s threatening to beat up Harry or selling his daughter’s private letters to a tabloid, Thomas has inspired estranged parents everywhere by showing them that you can still be a toxic presence in the life of a child who stopped talking to you years ago.


In his ongoing effort to try and attract the attention of The Good Daughter, Thomas has launched a YouTube channel with Karl Larsen, who is apparently some freelance paparazzo who hunted Thomas down to snap a picture and wound up forming a friendship with his prey.

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We begin with a bizarre, ungrammatical intro, in which Karl prepares the unfortunate viewer for what’s in store:


“It’s an entertainment show,” he tells us.


“It’s comprised of our thoughts and opinions, and are subjective. Please come up with your own thoughts and your own opinions. And buckle up — it’s gonna be a wild ride.”


Okay?


At that point, there’s a weird transition effect, and we find ourselves looking at a static shot of Thomas and Karl, who are awkwardly crammed into the same tiny frame.


Naturally, the conversation immediatelty turns to Meghan, with Karl asking Thomas if he would be willing to testify against Meghan in her upcoming court battle against Samantha.

Thomas, Meghan


Not surprisingly, it seems that Thomas has been waiting for this moment for quite some time.


“I would be more than happy to,” he told his stalker-turned-friend.


“I’ve been trying for almost four years to get to see my daughter and her ginger husband in a courtroom face-to-face,” Thomas continued.


“I’d be thrilled to defend my oldest daughter.”


The irony of Thomas claiming that he’s taking the stand out of fatherly obligation is almost too much to bear.


Samantha is suing Meghan for what she claims are false statements the Duchess has made to the press, particularly during her interview with Oprah Winfrey last year.


It seems that Samantha takes issue with Meghan’s claim that she was raised in “virtual poverty,” claiming that both sisters attended “elite and expensive private schools.”

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It’s anyone’s guess why Samantha thinks she’ll be able to convince a judge that Meghan should have to shell out 70 grand for allegedly misrepresenting her own childhood.


But it should be fun to see her try, especially now that Thomas is in on the grift!



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Bellie Brown
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